For Teens: Dealing with Your Parents’ Blind Spots Without Losing your Sanity
For Teens: Dealing with Your Parents’ Blind Spots Without Losing your Sanity At some point in your teens or early 20’s you might realize that some of your stress and tension might involve your parents. Starting around 11 or 12 years old, we naturally start forming our own ideas about life, how it works, and […]
Breaking the Worry Loop: Seeing how Fear about the Future is made of Bad Data
Breaking the Worry Loop: Seeing how Fear about the Future is made of Bad Data Today’s post is about how terrible we are at predicting the future, and yet we seem to trust our prediction skills 100%. We recently got a golden retriever puppy. I expected a cuddly, fuzzy ball of dough. What we got […]
Hardship: It’s a Grind, but it’s Your Greatest Teacher
Hardship: It’s a Grind, but It’s Your Greatest Teacher In my youth I was a big-time procrastinator. Typically I’d start writing a paper at 10pm the night before it was due. It always struck me that once 10pm hit and I had to sit down and start writing, it really wasn’t that bad. I’d get […]
How Letting Go Creates Independent Kids: Parenting Teens with Trust vs Control
How Letting Go Creates Independent Kids: Parenting Teens with Trust vs Control I hear from a lot of parents of teens that struggle with the loss of connection they used to have when their kids were younger. Lack of connection with teens can happen for a number of reasons. Teens consistently struggle with things like […]
Getting Yourself Back on Track: It’s Something that Happens to You Naturally
Getting Yourself Back on Track: It’s Something that Happens to You Naturally Today’s video is about how we have a natural default to regain our balance in life when we lose it. It may not seem like it because we all find ourselves in regular waves of problems like relationship issues, financial stress, self-doubt or […]
Until you’re Out, Be 100% In: How Fully Committing yourself Can Save your Relationship
Until you’re Out, Be 100% In: How Fully Committing yourself Can Save your Relationship Ever find yourself aimlessly wandering the aisles of the grocery store hoping for that amazing dinner idea to strike you? There’s an endless web of complexity waiting for you. You want something healthy, but has to taste good, with high-quality ingredients […]
When your Teen Stops Caring about School: Listening May Be your Best (and Only) Approach
In my first few years in high school I was a terrible student. I got mostly Cs and Ds with an A or B mixed in (in pottery, badminton, and the occasional literature class). I failed pre-Algebra twice before I passed. The teacher comments on most report cards were typically ‘Disruptive in class,’ ‘Doesn’t apply […]
Pressuring Yourself to Live up to Your Potential: A Stress-Inducer with No Actual Payoff
Yesterday on my drive to Costco I made every stoplight. I didn’t hit a single red light. Maybe this is a sign that my world is too small but it was exciting enough that I told the cashier. She had her own ‘made all the lights’ story. Sometimes things come together perfectly in a moment […]
Sometimes your Best Move in Life is Admitting You Don’t Have All the Answers
Today’s video is about the idea that sometimes in life less effort on our part can lead us to more clarity and forward-motion. I saw this recently after hanging out with a close friend of mine named Elaine. Elaine had been a chronic cigarette smoker for many years, and then one day she stopped. So […]
Losing your Way: It Doesn’t Mean there’s Something Wrong with You
Today’s video highlights two clients that both felt they’d failed in life. Client #1 is 21, had been academically ‘gifted’ as a kid, then started failing classes in high school and college as school got harder. Client #2 is a therapist who “thought she had it all together” but is currently going through divorce #2. […]