Pressuring Yourself to Live up to Your Potential: A Stress-Inducer with No Actual Payoff
Yesterday on my drive to Costco I made every stoplight. I didn’t hit a single red light. Maybe this is a sign that my world is too small but it was exciting enough that I told the cashier. She had her own ‘made all the lights’ story. Sometimes things come together perfectly in a moment […]
Sometimes your Best Move in Life is Admitting You Don’t Have All the Answers
Today’s video is about the idea that sometimes in life less effort on our part can lead us to more clarity and forward-motion. I saw this recently after hanging out with a close friend of mine named Elaine. Elaine had been a chronic cigarette smoker for many years, and then one day she stopped. So […]
Losing your Way: It Doesn’t Mean there’s Something Wrong with You
Today’s video highlights two clients that both felt they’d failed in life. Client #1 is 21, had been academically ‘gifted’ as a kid, then started failing classes in high school and college as school got harder. Client #2 is a therapist who “thought she had it all together” but is currently going through divorce #2. […]
Fixating on Problems: It Gives You Something to Do, but it Slows Down your Answer-Factory
Today’s video is about how common it is for people to fixate on a problem as a way to solve it. And how it doesn’t work. Fixating on problems is like pushing the elevator call button over and over again. That’s not how the system works. It’s gives people a temporary distraction from the feeling […]
Stop Trying to Do it All: Dropping the “I’m amazing at everything” Mindset
When I was in high school I was hanging out with my friend Aaron and he said something like “You’re always so positive about things. I love that about you.” For a few short hours, I felt fantastic. It was the best feeling to have someone stop and really ‘see’ me and appreciate me. And […]
“Go crazy, then come back” Letting Go of the Stigma of Being Emotional or Losing Your Way
I created today’s video to point out how normal it is for people to get emotional, lose their bearings, or lose their way in life. I share about a teen who found out someone close to her had been lying to her, was extremely upset about it, then felt ashamed for being upset. She’d always […]
The Spiritual Payoff of Staying Focused on Your Own Lane (“Comparison is the Thief of Joy” Part 2)
In an earlier video, I talked about the habit of comparing ourselves to others and what a distraction and happiness-killer that can be. I got so much feedback I decided to create a Part 2. In the first video I talked about the enormously disruptive and emotionally taxing effects of comparison on parents trying to […]
A Little Patience and Faith: All We Really Need When We Lose Our Way (and sometimes all we have)
One of the things you can count on in life is the fact of change. Even when things are going well, like a career or a relationship, either life changes or we change. Or both. And it doesn’t have to mean something went wrong. We grow out of interests, what matters to us changes, or […]
Why Some Couples Get Closer Over Time while others Get More Strained: Understanding Separate Realities
Back in the 90’s when I first started working at my family business, my grandparents handled all the shipping for our company. If you’re familiar with the early works of my dad, Dr. George Pransky, before there were digital downloads, there were cassette tapes. His tapes were slowly and carefully wrapped and delivered on-foot to […]
Embracing a Life of Mistakes and Apologies: Taking the Easy Route
A client reached out this week that I helped 15 years ago when she was a troubled teen. She’s 30 now, doing great, and thanked me for something I’d taught her. It had turned her life around. What I taught her was such a small point I don’t even remember talking about it. But I […]